Monday, May 07, 2012

So Wrong. Again. X 2

You may well wonder why I was at the SilverCity in Newmarket. Why I would go north of the 401 really is just as much a mystery, but the answer is really quite simple - I am a good friend.

My friend Momo and I had planned, after far too long a gap, an outing where we could catch up and hang out. Her being in Barrie and my being in Toronto does not allow for "drive by / quick drop-in" visits. About 3 weeks ago we laid down the law, picked a "no one can back-out" date and that is how I ended up in Newmarket. Meeting half way is most civilized.

Circumstances beyond anyone's control resulted in her 3 kids joining us. I have to say that Boston Pizza must be the best friend of parents everywhere! For less than $7 they get a drink, a meal, dessert AND colouring books that keeps them entertained, and from what I could see, quite content. LSC had previously told me about her kids fondness for BP, but to see it in action was fascinating.

It helps that she has 3 well behaved kids to start with, but you put a mini pizza shaped chocolate in a mini pizza box and you have the holy grail of child control. Amazing.

So what then was 'so wrong?' The Pirates - Band of Misfits. That's what was so wrong. We paid more for the movie and snacks than we did for lunch, WITH mini pizza chocolate, and the dessert was more entertaining.

For the sake of the children, for I am always thinking of others, especially wee precious children for they are our greatest resource, I guffawed on cue in all the right places. Despite my efforts, Momo and I could only grant this slice of celluloid a 3 out of 10.

The other critics in our crew, were far more generous with scores of 6.5 - 8. No accounting for taste I suppose.

Speaking of taste, I experienced something even more disturbing than the movie, that validated my fear of the burbs and all things north of the 401. I deliberately didn't eat much at lunch knowing full well I wanted popcorn in the theatre.

Once the kids were parked in their seats, Momo took orders and we hit the snack bar. What could possibly go wrong leaving 3 youngsters in a theatre? Alone? Without parental supervision? Nothing apparently. They were all still there when we got back and none of them were bleeding or crying.

Loaded down with various sour candies, liquorice and water, I told you they were good kids, come on, water? At a movie? Really? we went back in just as the previews were starting. Perfect timing. Having ordered a large popcorn, we all started chowing down.

I only had a couple pieces and Momo said "is there butter on that?" I said I thought there was, for the record, NOT ordered, and headed back to the concession stand. Luckily there was no line and I got the girl I had ordered from.

Explaining I didn't want butter, she apologized and said she would replace it. What I didn't realize was that she meant 'replace' in the literal sense. She took the bag that had been pawed at by 3 sets of, what Fauntleroy would call "sticking jam hands," and put it back in the little warmer fridge thing where the pre-filled bags live and handed me another.

"ummmm, we've eaten out of the other one" I said. "Oh that's okay, I'll top it up for the next person that wants butter" was her chipper response. Her smile was so alarming I just backed away from her.

Don't get me wrong, I convinced myself that the second bag was nice and fresh and no one else had had it strapped to their face like a feedbag and ate more than my share. But I have to admit, I did let the kids eat the top third.


Blogger Blair said...


You spent the afternoon with children?!

4:55 AM  

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