So wrong

Another season of April birthday's has come and gone. My own auspicious day aside, I know four other Aries who share the month with me. Typical of the sign, you'll note I made it about me.

Despite a never ending de-cluttering and thinning out of bric-a-brac, I always manage to generate a birthday wish list. Thanks to the sleuthing efforts of Kitkat, this year it included pieces of my new tea service pattern, English Renaissance.

Cups and saucers aside, I was treated to bubbles, a bounty of books, shoes, theatre tickets and upholstery fabric that I was told two years ago was no longer available. Not sure HOW he did it, but IronMan found 12 yards. Good thing I still love it!

If that had not arrived, he had a back-up gift all planned out. As you read on, I think you'll agree, it's a good thing the fabric fairies were listening.

Mentioned in previous posts, I have been given a taste of victory in the world of bake-offs and it is my intention to rule the south-western Ontario fall fair circuit in 2012. As I roll into various fair grounds, I thought about making an intimidating first impression by getting "Pie King" or "Pie Queen" vanity plates.

IronMan seized upon this idea, and in cahoots with Baco Noir and IronGirl, started to investigate various names on the above theme. 

For me, pie is nothing but GREAT pastry filled with the perfect balance of ingredients that is as equally satisfying at breakfast as it is at dinner. I am well aware however, of it's other various connotations and use as a double entendre. 

Just as IronMan was about to hit the 'confirm' button on the department of motor vehicle website, IronGirl suggested he google the lingo for the agreed upon vanity plate - "pie baker." Thank you my dear sister for making this wise suggestion and to the aforementioned fabric fairies for finding 12 yards of Bee De Lys in Wedgewood blue.

I would hate to think of the welcome I would get at various fairgrounds knowing that, according to the Urban Dictionary, a pie baker is:

"a child molester. Can be used to suggest rape and child molesting (especially in the movie The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe) when in the presence of small children. God Sara, the White Witch is such a pie baker."

More disturbing than this discovery, is the fact that you can order pie baker t-shirts and coffee mugs from Urban Dictionary. A license plate is one way to get yourself beat up at the fair but with a t-shirt, aren't you kind of looking for trouble on every street corner? 

Happy Anniversary

I am not sure "happy" belongs in the title, but since I am half way through a bottle of Veuve Clicquot, and a tin of foie gras, why not?

Previous blog postings have illustrated my interest / fascination / enthralment (call it what you will) with all things Titanic. For the past few months, news agencies have been telling and retelling countless stories about the ill-fated "ship of dreams."

James Cameron re-released Titanic in 3D. Thank you, LYB, for taking me as part of my birthday. Great to see it in IMAX but must say the 3D didn't do much for me.

I had hoped that one of the fancy hotels in Toronto would host a "last supper" event but it was not to be. And I found out too late that there were two cruises planned that would retrace the planned route on this, the 100th anniversary, of her maiden voyage.

Alas, they were both sold out. And yes, I would have paid the $10,000 for the best suite. Mind, for the money, I would have expected that complete experience. One of the cruises said they would "recreate everything except for the sinking." Come now, for that kind of gravy, give everyone a wetsuit, make sure there were enough lifeboats (we can change that ONE detail) and poke a few holes in her side. That's what insurance is for.

So with no 5 star, 12 course dinner, and not a cruise to be had, I decided to make my own commemoration at home. This morning, I had my houseboy (that's me) prepare fresh currant scones and had a lovely pot of tea as I watched 'the other' Titanic movie, A Night to Remember.

As much as I would have loved to savour my cuppa in the Titanic china now on offer at William Ashley, that Kerouac thoughtfully sent me a photo of a couple weeks back, my Scottish nature will not allow for such extravagance.

Having several china patterns, I know that this too will be discontinued one day (sooner rather than later I should think now that the 100 year hype is over) and I will be able to snap it up for a fraction of the price on any number of 'replacement' type websites.

Now I sit among a stack of Titanic books, looking at the pictures more than reading if I am to be completely honest, and admiring the piece of flooring from her sister ship Olympic that Kitkat gave to me as a gift years ago. That boy can find ANYTHING on the net.

For those with a similar interest, I hope your day is as nice as mine. Must dash however, as my glass is near empty. Not topping it up would be a tragedy indeed.

Surely I have mentioned before that I have been accused, I think that’s a justifiably strong word, of being high maintenance. While I have argued that in the past, the other day I myself felt the need to add the word ‘ungrateful.’

Rather considerately, IronMan made the bed before heading off to work and 5 minutes after he peddled away I saw that the duvet wasn’t squared at the end; one corner hanging lower than the other. I set about correcting this bed making mistake and soon found myself re-fluffing the pillows, re-making his version of “hospital corners” and re-arranging the bolsters and “lookin’ pillows.” In short, I remade the entire thing.

I take part of the blame for my fastidious, fussy ways as I come by it naturally. I won’t say which of my parents I get it from, but you can likely guess. My behavior has recently been accentuated through the reading of “Home Comforts: The Art and Science of Keeping House.” Once again, the dollhouse girls are partly to blame here as it was a recommended read in Real Simple.

There were no “a-ha” moments for me whilst I read the book but it was interesting none-the-less. Some suggestions, like taking out the garbage every night, are a little excessive given that I live alone and my dry dustbin can take weeks to fill.

One thing it did do was get me excited, perhaps sadly, about spring-cleaning! After 4 years, IronMan knows to steer clear of the bedroom every 3 months. Especially when the seasons change. Sheet changing aside, this is when the mattress gets rotated, and maybe flipped, the mattress pad washed and air-dried and seasonal sheet changes take place.

Yes, I iron the sheets & pillowcases and drying aside, can easily spend 2 ½ hours making the bed just so. I could probably cut this time in half if I had a sheet press so that is going on my Christmas list for sure.

As it is also Easter weekend, and I am hosting, I had to iron a tablecloth. Again, sadly, I get quite chuffed when I get one pressed just so and today I delivered the Mecca of pressing perfection. Starch, spray bottle and iron in hand, I got that sucker so flat I actually took a picture to share with you.

Before setting the table tomorrow, I can guarantee you that I will stop each time I walk by that table to admire my handy work.

I know, I know, pride is a sin, but ladies, that is one fine looking table!